You know, we assume older people know manners. I'm here to tell you, not all of them do. For instance:
1) Calling and leaving a message on the machine telling someone you're showing up at 5:00 pm that day does NOT constitute calling to schedule an appointment!
2) Telling someone that they have the wrong feelings about family without knowing their background isn't helpful... especially when they didn't ask your opinion.
3) Thinking that you have to take a teen down a notch to show them who's boss even though the teen is perfectly within reason AND you agree with them is just stupid.
and
4) Requesting that other people hound someone you're hounding because they won't call or email you back isn't going to get you the results you want. Although it's rude of the other person to not respond, perhaps you need to rethink your tactics. Antagonizing them further is ruder.
I am big on manners. While I realize and accept that not everyone thinks the same, manners can still play a major role in human relations. When my children answer the phone, I make sure their polite. They know to always identify themselves when they call another phone, even though they know there is Caller ID in the world - you can never assume that the person has looked, or even chooses to use that service. Please and thank you are little words that increase love and happiness in the world. My children do it regularly - every meal we are overwhelmed with "Thank yous" for the dinner that was bought and prepared for them. Well, unless it's something like spinach that someone is wrinkling their nose at. (We're not perfect.) We watch what we say in front of other people, trying to be aware of cultural differences and personality. Sometimes you just don't like someone. That's okay - you don't have to throw it in their face. That's rude.
I don't think you have to homeschool to teach these principles, but you do have to be aware. You need to actually be PRESENT during phone calls - at least at first. You need to remind, remind, remind, without anger or accusation. You can't correct what you don't know, and you can't correct if your relationship is in shambles - it will fall on deaf ears. It's not the easy road, but when you children are asked back because they're kind, helpful, considerate, and WELL MANNERED, the confidence from acceptance is well worth the effort.
In my opinion. ;)
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